Letter from Mama - Week Two

Dear Riley,

You are officially two weeks old today. I’m sorry I haven’t written sooner, but it’s really hard to pull myself away from you now to send an email to the future you.

You’ve had a big week! At your second doctor’s appointment, you weighed a whopping 7 pounds 12 ounces, but I’m confident you are over 8 lbs by now. You’ve mastered the ‘trifecta’ of poop, pee & puke all at once, so we finally had to give you your first bath - luckily it didn’t wash away your sweet baby smell.

You met some more new friends and took your first trip to our house in East Hampton. (You slept the whole way!) Your belly button stump came off too – another reminder that you’re your own little person now and not part of me anymore. It’s a little sad to think that, but after 10 months of your heels in my ribs, I’m happy to relinquish your uterine dwelling.

Also new this week, you had your first trip to Main Beach (again, you slept right through it.) Mom and dad were thrilled to see the sand for the first time ALL SUMMER. We went on our first of many shopping excursions to Kmart, TJ Maxx and the Gap (Mama needed some new pants) and guess what!? Yep. You slept right through!!!

Your dad and I were just saying how strong you are getting! You can lift your head so well now and love looking around over our shoulders. Dad was trying to change your diaper this morning and you wouldn’t unclench your little legs. Such a stinker!

My favorite thing you do these days is the funniest little lion roar/snort when you are starting to eat. It’s pretty hard to describe, but it sure is hilarious. I’d try to catch it on video, but not so sure about that since you’re still breastfeeding and someday you’ll think that’s super weird.

We’re driving out to the beach for the week and you are whimpering quietly in your sleep. It’s grey and rainy and so cozy to have our little family snug in the car. Hope you are having sweet dreams, little man!

I love you.

Mama

My Beautiful FInisher Medal

I'm so sorry for the overdue announcement, but DANG how can I stop inhaling this delicious new baby smell for more than a second!?!?!?

Riley Anson Maloy

was born Saturday, August 15th at 4:50pm
at St. Vincent's Hospital in NYC.
7 pounds, 10 ounces. 20.5 inches

Rick and I couldn't be more thrilled! He is PERFECT and healthy and had had quite the epic arrival.

I started my 'race report' in the hospital and quickly realized the recap (like the labor) was not going to be quick. I'll keep working on it and get it posted sometime soon. In the meantime, I'll share the email announcement Rick so cleverly wrote after 3 days in labor. I'm still amazed he could form a sentence, much less think creatively, so he gets MAJOR dad kudos for this one.

From: riley.maloy@emailaddress.com
To: My Friends and Family
Date: Saturday, August 15th, 9:52 pm
Subject: Hello, World!

Hey Everyone, I just moved to NYC today and man is this town cool. Where else would a swinging single dude want to live, but here in the Big Apple? Truth be told, the trip here was a bit longer than I expected. I didn't think it would take 51 hrs.

It was a good thing I did move, since the plumbing in my old place really went haywire. Get this...I was hanging in my pad, chillin' in the hot tub starting around 2PM on Thursday, when out of now where the tub springs a leak and all the water come rushing out. I was soaking for a long time so it was about 7PM on Friday. Since I was moving, I figured I'd wait around for the repairman for as long as I could to fix it for the next tenant, but the repairman never came and I fell asleep. The next thing I know a hurricane hits at 4:50PM on Saturday August 15th and shears the roof off my house. Luckily someone yanked me out through the roof and then wrapped me in a blanket. Must of been hurricane relief from the Red Cross, they were really nice and airlifted me to my new home.

As I was flying over my old house, I saw them stitch up the roof. I was glad the old place was still intact and doing well. They weighed me before the flight to see if we had to rearrange any weight on the plane, but I'm happy to report that I'm tipping the scales at a cool 7lbs. 10oz. so they didn't have to do anything. Leg room was nice my 20 and 1/2 inch frame fit perfectly.

My cool new friends, Rick and Heather say that I have a ton of people to meet and I'm looking forward to it. They say you are all fantastic and really fun. Apparently we're staying at St. Vincent's for a few extra days for some much needed R&R. A few vacation photos are attached, sorry couldn't resist.

Look for my launch party sometime in late Sept. I hear we throw great terrace parties.

See you soon.

Riley Anson Maloy

Off to Transition

It's entirely too early in the morning to be on the computer, but I'm not ready to face the day (and anyway, Starbucks doesn't open for another 15 minutes.)

I had my follow up sonogram + fetal check up yesterday and Baby M. (as suspected) is happy as a clam. We discovered that the old saying 'the right hand doesn't know what the left hand is doing' is sadly, my body's mantra. My left side BP was markedly higher than my right so the recommendation was to induce me immediately. I'd been monitoring the right side for the past week and since it had been totally fine I was completely blindsided with that diagnosis. I got my Chief Negotiator (Rick) on the phone with my midwife and together they worked out The Plan.

Briefly, The Plan is to see her this morning as scheduled and head to the hospital around 2pm to begin an induction.(There are already 4 inductions scheduled this evening, on top of whatever women actually go into labor on their own, so we have to be hours early in order to get a room.) Ahh, NYC.

I spent last night getting some last ditch acupunture and we met the 'city family' for a last minute, last hurrah pasta dinner. I'm lucky to have such a great family - both by blood and by kinship. This baby has a lot to look forward to.

My Meltdown didn't begin in earnest until we got out of the cab on the way home. But since it's started it hasn't really stopped. (Can someone do some research on tears and dehydration?) Though I was wiped out, sleep eluded me for much of the night and when Rick's alarm went off this morning for his 5am brick, I was jolted awake. (Goodbye, Sleep, I'll see you again in a few years.)

I have a few hours to really pull myself together here. Knowing that the only way to survive this day is let myself relax into the flow, to control my emotions and ration my energy and see where things go....to focus on the now. I'm trying really hard to visualize the feeling of a swim start - how I can either fight my way through the bodies and waste time and precious energy, or how I can relax and use the flow of forward motion, the current of everyone else's energy to surge forward.

So, as you make your way through your day, think of us. Fingers crossed for a safe 'race.' Apparently the start line is FINALLY around the corner.

Let the adventure begin!

It's All in the Timing

No baby yet.

Pretty much every conversation, phone call and email these days starts with that fact. (Though, frankly I would often like to point out the obvious...)

"OH! Were we supposed to TELL you when the baby gets here!?!?"

I'm kidding. (Mostly!)

41 weeks today and I have to say, I'm really grateful for everyone's patience. Maybe they're all just scared I'm going to lose my sh-- and eat them whole. For those of you who have been here before, you know that there are moments when you think you might explode in some cosmic pregnancy accident - that maybe the baby will just kick you in the ribs one more time and that will be all...BOOM. And you will have been the first ever to give birth by combustion and aside from the mess, it wasn't so bad!

Really most of the waiting is fine. It seems time oozes by with the speed of a boring day at work - punctuated by meals and maybe a trip to the drugstore. Watching the clock trickle minutes of your life away, but not really caring. You'll never get them back, but really it won't be until much later in life that you'd want them back anyway... (Okay, okay - more likely I'll be wanting these lazy afternoons back in just a few weeks!!!)

Speaking of work....I've been watching the story of the sinking ship that is my old company on the news all day. (Thanks, Anne.) It appears that I jumped ship just in time. I can't imagine what it would have been like to watch the drama unfold and planning to return after the baby is born. I'm wondering if the group of women who left around the time that I did had some sort of intuition. I don't miss that feeling of looking around wondering who will be left when the axe falls.

And with that, another hour oozes by and still NO BABY. If this little person has good timing, today would be an ideal day to arrive. The apartment is clean, my mom gets into town tonight and my midwife is at the hospital at this very moment.

I'll keep you posted.

Check out time is 11 AM.

It's been a long few days around here.

We spent all of yesterday at the hospital, checking in on this babe and me. The little bugger is perfectly content to continue his or her tropical vacation for a while longer. I mean, really - who wouldn't? Free room service? No responsibilities? Spending the day floating in the tropical waters without a care in the world? Why, yes. I think I'd stay until the last moment too.

Mom on the other hand is having a rougher go of it. This pregnancy has been totally normal and healthy (a blessing) and I've had few complaints - I am still sleeping well, escaped both morning sickness and heartburn BUTTTT (and that is a BIG but...) I've struggled since day one with my blood pressure at every doctor's visit. It seems that my easy-going nature is only a thin veil of calm over a bundle of nerves. (You know how it is, appearing calm and relaxed actually MAKES you that way...and totally crushes the competition!)

So, the routine has been take my BP once at the beginning of any appointment, marvel at it's height and then relax, go about the business of the visit and then take it again, marveling at how much I can bring those numbers down just by relaxing and calming my mind. Folks, I've made it through 40 weeks and 1 day like this....but apparently 40 weeks and 2 days was my limit. So, after checking in on baby's status at the four star, luxury resort in the Caribbean - aka my uterus - it was off to do some heart rate monitoring for both of us. Baby = fine. Mom = high. Big. Freaking. Surprise.

I calmly explain the BP drill and the Nurse-Who-Chews-Her-Gum-Like-A-Horse nods along, not hearing my plea over the Earth Shattering Volume of her Gum Chewing. Next thing I know, they're sending me to L&D (that's Labor and Delivery, guys) for (insert scary voice over man here) More Monitoring. I beg. I plead. Please just take it again. I've been waiting quietly and patiently and meditating. But no, apparently Chews-Like-A-Cow has orders from Above and so off to L&D I go.

Can you imagine what my blood pressure is now????

Yes, well. Luckily, I'd made friends with a few of the nurses the other time I'd been there and the hilarious Nurse Nancy (yep - really, Nurse Nancy) remembers Rick and I and gets us settled into our room. At this point, I've been there for 3 hours and am starving, pissed and obviously, scared. I know that if I cannot lower my BP, I'll be admitted and induced almost immediately. (Bye, bye laboring at home. Bye, bye moving around in labor. Bye, bye drug free plan.) So I'm trying my best not to TOTALLY. FREAK. OUT. Mostly, I'm frustrated that this is all my fault, since I can't keep it together and keep my head out of my body's way. Arggggh.

I get all hooked up and try to settle into some meditation (mostly focusing on the photo of Lake Placid on my banner, actually!) and trying hard to drown out the blaring noise of the galloping horse next to me (baby's heart sounds like a Dances with Wolves stampede) and the BEEP BEEP BEEP of the monitor telling me my BP is still high. This BEEP system sounds just like the ones in the movies where the spaceship is about to be attacked by martians. WARNING: SECTOR TWO MUST EVACUATE. WARNING! WARNING! WARNING!

Oh yeah, this is super calming....just when I think my heart is about to explode. The doctor on call comes in to tell me she's spoken with my midwife who wants to admit me and begin the prep for an induction.



I'll spare you the details of the call (in case anyone is still reading at this point) and we decide that we will a) get me some lunch b) leave me to rest quietly for a while and c) continue monitoring for a few hours before making any decisions.

Nurse Nancy kindly turns down the stampede of horses soundtrack, takes the BP cuff off and Rick gets me the World's Best Turkey Sandwich. Things are looking up.

An hour or so later, Nurse Nancy comes back in to take my blood pressure and I've dropped the number by almost 20 points. A blood pressure PR! Also, no protein in my urine, so they've ruled out the dreaded preeclampsia. Now, we wait on the blood work....which (after hours of waiting)

Comes

Back

FINE!

So, 7 hours later, we are back where we began the day. Diagnosis: baby is fine, mom is crazy and we are sent home with instructions to monitor my blood pressure twice daily. No induction. No tears. No baby.

So, sweet baby of mine - we hope you are enjoying your all expenses paid, luxurious tropical vacation. I know how lovely it must be. I promise though, once you are on the plane, you'll realize that you are actually looking forward to being at home. Even though bills and laundry await, home is a great place to be! Everyone is SO excited to meet you - they have been waiting a LONG time. We have fun times to look forward to - trips to Central Park, days at the beach, adventures in the mountains...but we can't start until you get here! Your cozy little bed is waiting and so are we.

So hurry up!

Internet, I'm in a MOOD.

Ten thoughts for the day:

1. Two words: DUE DATE.
2. Two more: No baby.
3. In my future: birthday cake. I'm starting the party, baby or not.
4. If one more person threatens that I won't be able to shower, eat or dress myself in the coming weeks, they are going to regret it. Are they going to cut Rick's brain out and break his arms while I am in labor? Why can't he hold the baby for 5 minutes while I brush my teeth? Am I delusional here? Wait. Don't answer that.
5. My midwife spent twenty minutes today asking about Rick's musical taste, but still doesn't recognize me when she calls my name in the waiting room. Is it bad that I hope she's not available when I go into labor?
6. Who declared today National Cute Sundress day? EVERY woman in NYC is rockin' her most stylish, perfectly fitting summer dress and trendy sandals.
7. I'm stuffed into ill fitting maternity shorts....again.
8. I need a warning sticker today. Something along the lines of BEWARE: PREGNANT AND VICIOUS.
9. I can hear the ticking clock in the baby's room and it's driving me crazy. (And no, that is not a figurative reference. There's really a ticking clock!)
10. Whew. Thanks, internet for letting me bitch. I feel much better now.

The Transition

I have been superstitiously holding off on packing my hospital bag, thinking that it would give me something to do in early labor. I finally gave up the ghost last week and pulled most of my stuff together.

Could there be a more fitting use for a transition bag?!?

There was real dust on mine, but it felt so good to clean her up and get her ready for the next adventure. (I almost cried though when I found leftover snowboarding clothes from last February. Had it been that long since our last excursion?!)

I had to throw a few tri essentials in - a chocolate gu, a packet of peanut butter, some powdered gatorade endurance mixed with some carbo pro and two IronCocktail water bottles. I'll have some other light snacks around too, but you never know when you'll need instant, easily digestible calories! Digging through the nutrition bin was like seeing an old boss, "It's great to see you! It never crossed my mind that I would actually miss you when you weren't around!!!"

It is absolutely bizarre to pack baby clothes though - especially knowing one set will come home unworn! Tomorrow is my due date and it just doesn't seem possible that we'll ever actually get to meet this little person. Rick is watching my every move, waiting for some sign that This. Is. It. He just made us a dinner reservation at Otto (olive oil gelato = love) for tomorrow night so we can have a birthday party.

HEAR THAT, KID?!? We're celebrating your birthday with or without you!!! HURRY IT UP!

The Set-Up

I had a long discussion with Katie yesterday to the tune of - why IM, why now? Why not set myself up for something with a more plausible chance of success?

While a small part of me recognizes that as a smart strategy, I'm not inclined to spend much time on the thought. I'd already considered the safer, more realistic options - a spring marathon, a fast Olympic, a solid 70.3, but none were inspiring to me. They certainly seem exciting as I'm still trapped in this duplex condo of a body, but in terms of really moving me...nothing came close.

Looking at my fears and worries for 2010 and comparing them to those I faced two years ago I realized something important. I have the luxury of knowing at least one of the curveballs that's about to be thrown at me. Part of the challenge of setting such long-term, large goals is accepting the surprises that life throws your way. A friend of mine's roommate died on their couch a little more than a month from this year's race. How did that affect her ability to train and race effectively? Had she seen it coming, would she not have signed up in the first place? What about losing your job mid-season? Getting injured? Sure, these are all things that can derail your plan to make it to the start line and achieve the goals you set for yourself, but to not set them because something MIGHT happen? That, to me, seems cowardly.

Could I be setting mysef up for failure? Yes, I suppose so. But to not even make the attempt, based only on the fear of the unknown would have been a much bigger failure for me.

In the meantime, we're totally immersed in the waiting game. I feel like a kid on a car trip -

Are we there yet?

No.

Are we there yet?

No.

Argh. Let's get this show on the road kid!